so here's my review: Dont bother. If u must, then skip the 3D.
Although it was an improvement of the Fallen shit, it still fall short of the entertainment value of the first film. While its plot and action is a bit more coherent this time round (but still chocked full of loop holes, plot holes and irrational decisions) and the action sequences are easier to follow, but a good deal of the movie is a snore fest. Esp anything that involves human characters. Sadly the new victoria secret gal, while giving us a good gratuitous view of her buttocks in the opening sequence, is a huge disappointment... no, make that a huge flower vase. There's no chemistry between her and the rest of the entire cast, and she cant act for nuts. She just stands there and either pouts or look shocked, but then again, its not like she has any other kind of supporting role to play.
Whats going on huh?
Despite the promised "high octane action" in 3D, I dont really think its worth watching in 3D, a good portion of the movie isnt really in 3D anyway, just the fighting sequence. Maybe its the GV's tech not so good, but all i got out of it was a massive headache.
The Bay-verse TF characters are really losing all their appeal, and it doesnt help that we get a whole bunch of new characters with no back-story, and one of them is a stereotypical Einstein bot that makes gadget, a couple of red-neck Stock car fans and an Italian ferrari, where combined together, dun even have 5 sentences. It also doesnt help that a whole bunch of them dies in the course of the story. Even worse than the robots are the human stories, cause they waste 30-60mins on stupid crap that no one gives a shit about : eg, the romance between Sam and Carly , the 3rd party rich dude with flashy cars trying to seduce Carly, The stupid assassination attempts by Laserbeak, Sam trying to get a job and the govt lady trying to boss Optimus around are all entirely a waste of time. I also dont like how particularly violent Optimus has become, kinda goes against his merciful , freedom loving, wise leader character you know? Now he's all "Optimus smaaaashhh!!, even the half-brained megatron doesnt do that.
The only plus point are some of the fighting sequences are nicely animated and choreographed, which you probably only see in the last hour or so, after dozing off for the 1st 90mins.
In short, let this be the end of the Bay-verse Transformers time line. If they ever make another one, pls do not involve Bay and focus the goddamn story on the robots, not the stupid humans.
Things that dont make any fucking sense in Dark of the Moon: (Spoiler after the break: click read more)
1. Apparantly Prime's humungous trailer is only used to transport his sword, shield and a Jet pack.
2. Why is megatron half headed damage not fixed? Does he enjoy walking around with half a brain? Is the little bots running around his head fixing him or salvaging parts? Starscream's all spanking new since part2, and judging by the giant tentacle monsters and hundreds of decepticons that they have (that are also spanking new), I'm sure they have no shortage of parts. After all, they fixed him up in part 2 that way ya?I dun remember that small doctor bot in part 2 was killed either.
3. Why the hell doesnt LaserBeak shoot Sam with his goddamn machine guns. He obviously have machine guns cos we see him kill the Russian dude with it. Does he fly faster than say, a steady stream of bullets?
4. Why didnt Sentinel accept the matrix from Prime? After all, think of the countless dead decepticons he can revive with it??!! Didnt he need an army?? He could have killed Prime there and then, in the desert, grabbed the matrix and go after his stupid pillars.
5. What kind of stupid space bridge did Sentinel designed that collapses when just ONE out of hundreds and hundreds of pillars go offline? Ever heard of redundancy and error/crash recovery? You think that a super genius like Sentinel would have ensured that there will be 101 backup systems in that fancy bridge of his. And for that matter, why didnt the autobots and the US ARMY just go round destroying pillars? That will put an end to the space bridge already? After all, we see each bunch of pillars is usually only guarded by 1 or 2 Deceps. Why go into their heavily fortified fortess to destroy Sentinel when they can take out the bridge first?
6. Since Soundwave is the Mercs SLS, why didnt the Energon detector go off when Carly was driving it around town??? We see that it worked when the alarm went off prior to the 3 black Chevy showing up.
7. Why is the most awesome Shockwave, (or so they say in the movie) , seen in many of the movie posters, only get a 1 liner and barely even get 5-10 mins of screen time? Hell, the giant tentacle monster got twice the screen time than he did!
1 Eye, 1 line. Sigh.
8. Why didnt the bad guy, and the robot watch, just kill Sam after the Autobots "left", after all, they are bad guys, and there's no point in letting him live.
9. Why are the robots so reliant of their "eyes"?? (ie Starscream: "My eye my eye I cant seeeeeee")
I dun recall they have eyes in their jet/car/truck/helicopter/laptop mode. They can see jolly well without it, why make a big fuss over their optics!?
RotF plot holes:
10. If megatron had that army of decepticons and ships on the moon hidden for eons, why didnt they use that in Revenge of the fallen to ensure that their fucking pyramind didnt blasted to bits. Why only bring a handful to earth during that battle and not, say, that giant tentacle monster.
11.If laserbeak (and soundwave apparantly) had been "behind the scenes" working for decades, how could no one know about the transformers??
12. Why didnt the Fallen detected Sentinel on the Moon? After all he's a Prime, and he's as much as threat to him as Optimus. Hell, he's even more of a threat, he fights better than Optimus!
13. You think that everyone and their mother would have recognize Sam after his face was plastered all over the world during the Alien invasion. Guess he was such a forgettable face eh?
What do you mean no one knows who I am?
Ending WTF:
14. Why the fuck did Megatron saved Prime from Sentinel when he could have waited till Sentinel decaptitated Prime then backstab him. Did he forget that he was suppose to 1. Kill optimus, 2. bring cybertron to earth, killing Sentinel at that point is going against that very master plan he had supposedly been planning for decades yes??? Thanks to the half brain moron, Prime killed them then both. Violently i might add. See, it doesnt pay to only have half a brain.
Nooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!
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